I just have to say this somewhere, so I am saying it here, loud and clear : I AM TOTALLY AND COMPLETELY IN LOVE WITH DEBBIE!!! Like head over heels, can't stop thinking about her, she has everything mentally AND physically I have ever wanted, have literally felt like I am in a romantic comedy in love. Last night, we met at Borders again, and I can honestly say that there were things that happened that were so awesome - I mean things that could only (or so I thought) happen in one of those movies. The best one of those was when we were kissing goodbye, and we had started to walk away from each other for the third or fourth ot fifth time, and all of a sudden, she turned back, ran towards me, and literally jumped on me! It was so, so - awesome! It wasn't some lustful type jump, but more of a "I'm crazy about you and don't want to let you go" type of jump. She even smacked my face a little on accident, and I said something that sounded totally like out of a movie; I said "Girl you are crazy! And as long as you are crazy about me, it's all good" or something like that.
It was EVERYTHING I could do to not tell her that I loved her. Every time we were kissing, and I looked into her eyes, I felt compelled to say it. But I displayed a discipline I never have and avoided saying it. Now I am sitting here wondering if I really accomplished anything by not telling her - by going against my natural impulses to such a degree. I am fairly certain she knows already, but still... I am thinking that I will probably wait until after I have met her kids and she has met mine before I actually say it. I honestly don't think that will make any difference, and I really hope it won't. But I want to be very genuine when I say it, and I want to make sure that there is absolutely zero chance that things will not work out for some reason. I want it to be real, right, and as close to perfect as possible. (shout out to my friend Mikey for giving some good advice about that too.)
I asked her where she saw our relationship going, and she said she really didn't think like that, that she lives in the moment pretty much. I agreed, and like the fact that she thinks like that. I brought up the idea of meeting each other's kids, as I thought it was probably the next "step" in the progression of our relationship. She said she didn't really have any set ideas on how long to wait and said she would be ok with it. I mentioned that I would like to set something up soon where we could all meet, and she thought that sounded good. I also mentioned that I wanted to take her on an actual "date" - one when neither of us had to be back by any certain time so we could just totally relax and spend as much time together as possible. Again, she was in agreeance, and it sounds like we are going to do that on the night of January 1st. How appropriate too : the first actualy night of a new year, starting it together. Again, cue the lights and roll the tape - the movie magic continues! Lol
I keep trying to think about what was so magical about November 28th, 2010 - the first day we met. I mean, numerologically speaking, it was not particularly special. I don't think my horoscope said anything about 'today you will meet up with the girl of your dreams.' I don't even remember getting any good fortune cookies that may have alluded to it. And maybe that is what was so special about it - that there was nothing singular about that day except for the fact that we met for the first time. So that day can be our day, with no other outside meanings or associations. It's the day we first met face to face, and that alone makes it a very, very special and singular day in the history of "Deb and Kev". Man, I like the sound of that - so much. She sent me a text this morning that said she feels very lucky that I am her guy - and I feel so incredibly lucky to have someone, and not just anyone, but my dream girl, say that about me. Someone pinch me... NO - WAIT - not yet; this is one dream I don't want to wake up from... ever. ♥
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